Am I a Helicopter Parent or Just Tuned in to My Child’s Needs?

Hi, I’m Heather—a mom of two and a therapist. Parenting is challenging, especially when every child is different. Supporting a child’s development often feels like an art, the tricky part is figuring out how much support they really need. Am I a helicopter parent, or am I providing what my child needs? 

Helicopter Parenting
Helicopter parenting happens when worry takes over. It is being overly involved in your child’s life. While this approach comes from a place of love, it’s often rooted in a fear of your child experiencing discomfort or stress. Kids raised this way can feel insecure and unsure of themselves, relying on others to solve problems instead of learning how to do it on their own. It can hinder their ability to build confidence and independence. This can affect everything from developing ease in building relationships, feeling competent in school and sports/agility, the confidence to seek out and overcome challenges —and it often follows them into adulthood. 

Room to Grow
It’s important for kids to face challenges, make mistakes, and learn to make decisions. When children are given the space to experience struggles and work through challenges on their own, they build more independence and self-confidence. They learn to trust their abilities and feel more self-assured to learn and grow. 

Balancing Struggle and Support
Providing opportunities for struggle with emotional support is an art and it can be useful to have professional feedback. 

When to Reach Out for Support:
● You feel anxious and avoid your child struggling with a challenge on their own
● Increasing your child’s independence makes you feel anxious
● Your child struggles with anxiety
● You’d like feedback about ways to support your child’s emotional growth 

Parenting is a journey, and every child has different needs. The goal is to strike a balance between support and letting them struggle or take on challenges. You love your child and want the best for them. Remember—it’s okay for adults to ask for support with parenting as well as your own needs too!

 

Heather Norrie BA, BSW, MSW, RSW, Social Worker/Therapist, Key Counselling Services