Entry #11: Real Life Isn’t a Holiday Movie

Dearest Readers,

This month I don’t have a cute rhyme in the title. I’ve never been more open with you like I am in this entry. I’m tearing up right now writing this so please bear with me today. I have severe bipolar disorder. I just spent 30 days in the mental health ward at my hospital because my medications stopped working. Even though I am finally home, I’m not bouncing back after almost a month. All I want to do is sleep. Bipolar isn’t curable. I didn’t know that I was experiencing mixed mania. It is the worst type of mania to treat. Imagine telling people around you that you can’t stop moving. Because of this you can’t sleep or sit to relax. My new medications have stopped the mania. We now know that this symptom requires a visit straight to the hospital emergency room. We let it go on too long. 

That’s a lot to take in all about me. I tell you all of this so that you can not only learn how to help yourself, but also be inspired to have hope. I will also share the most painful, darkest points of my life. Why? Because you need to know that you’re normal. For example, over the holidays, someone might have just broken your heart. Many years ago, my husband of fourteen years broke up with me close to the holidays. It’s painful to lose your white picket fence. Your life isn’t a movie. There isn’t always a happy ending. 

Thinking of all the Christmas goodies you just ate, will you please remember this? Every delicious recipe is a mix of ingredients that come together, where each are important to create the dish. That’s like our lives. Whatever you’re going through, one day it will make sense. I promise. If I can keep going, I know that you can too. 

Look up at the moon and stars to reflect on how incredible you are, and one thing that you’re proud of that you did in 2024. No credit card required. As we move into 2025 soon, will you come with me? Merry Christmas friends!

 

Stephanie Preston creates powerful, humorous videos on managing bipolar disorder symptoms. She is a Social Service Worker, Health Care Aide and suffers from severe bipolar depression herself. She is the proud wife of St. Thomas Mayor Joe Preston, loves being a grandma and is Crossfit obsessed. Follow her at www.tiktok.com/@bipolaronthebrain and www.facebook.com/bipolaronthebrain.