Falling Back Into Love
Having a strong relationship is key when raising little ones, but that is easier said than done. As parents, we tend to focus more on them than each other, but your relationship with your partner is just as important and needed for a balanced and happy family.
Once we have kids the romance changes for most and the stress we feel increases. The time demands on a parent shrinks the time we allot for quality time with our partner. As a result we have increased stress and lower moods which negatively affects our mental health as a parent, partner and as a family.
There are many ways for partners to “fall back in love” while juggling the act of parenting:
- Schedule once-a-month alone time. No kids. Just you and your partner for a walk, drink, dinner, driving range. Whatever activity you both used to enjoy that faded away with parenting, schedule it regularly.
- Listen to each other. Sometimes you won’t agree on how each of you wants to parent as we grew up in different environments. At the end of the day you are a team so actively listen to each other be understanding before judging or reacting. This fosters a supportive relationship.
- Tell each other all the things you like and love about each other. Positive reinforcement is steeped in research and never fails to improve a relationship
- Plan special rituals for your partner. Maybe it’s liking a candle diffuser or soft music while you tell each other wonderful things about each other before bed.
- Go on a date. Book a babysitter and go to a place you fell in love with.
Reconnecting with your partner not only strengthens your relationship, it also the strengths the connection of your entire family. Take care!
Becky Morrison is a Nurse Practitioner based out of Calgary who has specialized in mental health for over a decade. She is finally, after years of infertility, a mother of two busy little boys, and doting fur mom of her gentle giant, Stella. She is, and always will be, a strong advocate for mental wellness at all ages.
