I’ve Got You!

Recently, a close friend of mine shared she was starting the separation process from her marriage. It hit close to the heart when I learned of her update, as I could empathize with the life chapter of separation and all it can entail emotionally. I felt deeply for what she was navigating, however, I especially understood that initial stage of accepting the decision that the relationship has cycled through and it was time to start taking massive action. 

During my own divorce journey, my community was a vital component of supporting me as I discovered strength, clarity, courage, self-love and personal power. They were there each time I needed them to be, in the way I needed them to be most. And through that initiation into the next version of myself, I discovered two meaningful ways they made me feel good, that I would like to share with you… in hopes that you it can support your community also. 

(1) Identify Needs – Asking the question “what can I do to support you” when your person is moving through some choppy waters is meaningful. It may take time for them to fully sink into figuring out the answer and sharing it with you, however knowing someone’s got your back because they want to make you feel better is the love they need in that moment. 

(2) Hold Space – Just let them talk as you hold the space and listen. No need to solve their problems or take on any responsibility for their emotions. Let them lead the conversation and honour their authentic expression. Try and acknowledge their experience by validating their feelings if you can. An example of this can be: “I hear you. What you’re feeling makes sense. I’m sorry.” 

It’s a lot witnessing your person go through something so significantly life changing. However, knowing that you always have their best interest at heart and feeling safe to turn to you when they need it, is an awesome way to support them as they get up on their surfboard and ride the waves – with you right beside them.

 

Lyndsay Campbell is a co-parenting mother of two boys, a Life Transformation Coach and
Reiki Master.