People Pleasing is Out. Authenticity is In.
Try to please everybody and you’ll end up pleasing nobody. Not only that, but you’ll end up deeply unhappy in the process. There’s a huge misconception that trying to please people means you’re a “good person”. The reality is that if you’re trying to please everyone, you’re not living true to yourself, your values or forming genuine relationships with people.
Picture this. You get to be your most authentic self while being surrounded by people who would never want you to be anything other than that. Imagine how free you’d feel. What a beautiful thing!
I recently heard one of my favourite speakers, Trent Shelton, say that he isn’t loyal to people, but instead he is loyal to his values, and by having that approach he in turn attracts people into his life who share similar values. That really hit home with me because it’s the way I’ve been living my life for the past decade and it has had a significant impact on my overall happiness and quality of life.
It’s a natural instinct as humans that we crave connections with other humans. True connection doesn’t happen when we’re easily bending our beliefs and values to try and fit into everyone else’s expectations. True connection only happens when we feel loved and accepted as we are. I challenge you to look closely and ask yourself who you’ve been bending your personal values for? Who are you sacrificing your own happiness for? Do you even know your values?
Perhaps some deep reflection and soul searching is in order. If you value integrity and someone you hang out with is constantly doing questionable things, you’re naturally going to feel uncomfortable around them. If kindness ranks high on your values and someone in your life is constantly rude or mean, how the heck do you expect to feel great in that relationship?
Be honest with yourself. Are you a people pleaser? How can you start being more authentic today? Live true to yourself first and foremost and watch your life change!
Rebecca Hamilton,
Owner, Chick Boss Cake
