• Home


Self-talk refers to the ongoing internal conversation with ourselves that influences how we feel and behave. For example, if you find yourself in a traffic jam while rushing to work one morning, your selftalk could say, “My whole day is ruined” or you could say to yourself, “I will just push things back today and make up the time later.” How we talk to ourselves all day determines our mood, productivity, our relationships and our mental health. 

What are the benefits of self-talk?

  • Self-talk builds psychological development and confidence.
  • Children need to learn self-talk to make decisions like, “Should I hit him for taking my toy?“ or ”Should I wait my turn for the toy?“ The first quote is impulsive and is a younger child’s natural thought. As they age, they learn that there is a consequence for hitting. The second quote states their new level of reasoning and cognitive development. 
  • If your child plays on a sports team, they will need to learn self-talk to develop sportsmanship, improve their skills and reach a higher level of play when the handling of pressure and criticism are pivotal to competition.
  • Self-talk helps us assess risk in dangerous situations.
  • It helps us be more employable, more teachable and more coachable. 
  • It helps us build a healthy mindset.


Steps for parents to teach self-talk:

  • When you talk to your kids, avoid screens and focus on language. 
  • Talk out loud about what you are doing, even when doing the simplest tasks.
  • Teach children how to identify emotions and what they mean.
  • Teach them Mantras, which are important in developing confidence and a heathy mindset. They can help build character and give us strength during challenging times. Find Mantras that are appropriate for the age of your child. “I am fast, I am strong like a lion, I am a good worker.”

Sayings like “I can’t, I won’t, That will never happen, I hate that” will build negative self-talk. Negative self-talk can spiral quickly out of control and lead to anxiety, depression and self-doubt. Positive self-talk helps prevent mental health issues and self-doubt. Prepare your kids to have a healthy inner dialogue for life!

Larissa Mills, B. A., M.Ed. is the founder
of Iparentgen.com. She is a mother of three, a Parent Coach and a 4KIDS Sports & Educational Consultant.


Questions? Comments? Contact us today!

Subscribe to our Newsletter!

News Letter