Simplifying Infant Sleep
Parents can feel overwhelmed with advice or tips from family, friends or the internet when it comes to infant sleep. You may think you are doing something wrong if baby wakes in the middle of the night. If your baby likes to be cuddled to go to sleep, you may think that’s a bad habit you have created. You can start to question what you want to do versus what everyone tells you should do.
As a Parent Educator, I want to help parents understand their babies and what are realistic expectations. It’s not realistic to expect a baby to sleep long stretches without needing a diaper change or a feeding or a cuddle.
An infant sleep cycle is completely different than an adult’s. Infants are not yet able to sleep long stretches or even determine nighttime or daytime until the part of the brain that regulates the circadian rhythm is developed (between 3-6 months of age). Even then, we are led to believe that babies should be sleeping a full night at that point. This is a misconception.
Babies cry and wake up for many reasons. These reasons don’t stop at a specific age. Teething, growth spurts, illness, learning new skills, bad dreams – babies are designed to wake frequently to feed, to cuddle, to have needs met. If your best friend came up to you crying, you wouldn’t tell them to go cry alone or refuse to hug them in fear of them becoming dependent on you. We often think differently about our babies.
Adults can wake up for many reasons. The difference is that adults have the skills to fall back asleep or meet their needs (get a drink, go to the bathroom, etc.). Babies can’t do that. They are 100% dependent on us to help them.
The best thing you can do is create an environment that’s dark and a comfortable temperature, with a bedtime routine in place (and you try to stick it). Avoid electronics, and have white noise or music playing softly. Massage, skin to skin, is also recommended. The rest is up to baby and whatever stage they are going through. It’s okay to rock your baby to sleep. It’s okay to respond to their cries. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed and frustrated. Put baby down in a safe place and walk away for a few minutes. Take deep breaths. Try again.
Every baby is different. What worked for one parent and their baby may not work or may not be right for you. And that’s okay.
For questions about your baby, speak to a public health nurse by calling 519-663-5317.
For more information about sleep:
- https://caringforkids.cps.ca/handouts/pregnancy-and-babies/healthy_sleep_for_your_baby_and_child
- https://www.aboutkidshealth.ca/Sleep
- https://www.healthunit.com/sleep
Paula Dibbits, RECE, CIMI, Parent Support Educator, Middlesex-London Health Unit
